May is Peace Month in Port City. On May 20, the city is sponsoring a “violent toy” turn-in on the Mall. (I assume this means toys with the capacity to be used in violent play, not toys that are violent of their own free will.) Volunteers will make a peace sculpture out of the relinquished toys.

Wait. Back up. Let’s get this straight. So you’ve originally bestowed a few presents on your children with an open heart, but now that it’s Peace Month you have second thoughts about their appropriateness, so you’re supposed to march the kids on down to the town square and force them publicly to hand over the goods. Give back their toys. Atone for your bad judgment.

I think I’ll pass. Peace begins at home.